In & Out (1997)

Kevin Kline is a teacher whose famous gay former student says on television that he (Kevin Kline) is gay, at which point Kevin Kline I think figures out that he's gay?—and kisses Burt Reynolds, who has no mustache.

Burt Reynolds, Tom Selleck...same difference!

The Truman Show (1998)

Jim Carrey doesn't realize his whole life has been a reality television show produced by Ed Harris. His wife, January Jones, is in on it. (It can't possibly be January Jones, but that's who comes to mind. Maybe Sharon Stone?*) When the truth comes out, Jim Carrey rows a rowboat out to the edge of his world and talks to Ed Harris, who I think ends up feeling bad and lets him out.

SPOILER ALERT: This is actually what the edge of the world looks like.

* No, now I'm thinking of Total Recall. Very different movie.

Magnolia (1999)

Lots of intersecting storylines here, Altman-style, of which I remember next to none. Tom Cruise is a crooked self-help guru (might be confusing this with something in Donnie Darko), Aimee Mann sings a Harry Nilsson song, and there's a rain of frogs. I think one of the frogs knocks William H. Macy off a wall or something and breaks his glasses and/or face.

rana ex machina(?)

Movies I've Seen Only Parts Of: 9½ Weeks (1986)

Pretty sure I just fast-forwarded through this to watch the sex scenes...but I can't remember even those, so I guess it's a wash.

Oh, an art film, eh?

Drugstore Cowboy (1989)

Matt Dillon and...Patricia Arquette?—go on a drugstore-robbing spree so they can feed their prescription-drug habit. I think they stay in motels, and at some point somebody's in the ceiling. Are they hiding in the ceiling? No, I think they put a dead body in the ceiling. Whose? There's another guy, a third junkie. Is that who they put in the ceiling? At one point in this movie they talk to William S. Borroughs, maybe.

Oh, right, Heather Graham! I bet they put her in the ceiling.

Three Men and a Little Lady (1990)

Tom Selleck, Ted Danson, and Steve Guttenberg haven't killed that baby yet, and now she's, I don't know, four years old? Six years old? But they've corrupted her mind, so now she says, "What a crock." Her real father shows up, and he's some British guy who takes her to a big mansion, but somehow he's terrible (maybe a jerk, maybe an impostor), so the three men take their little lady back to America.

One time a bartender called me "Tom Selleck" to make fun of me
for the mustache I had at the time. Then we made out.

A Stranger Among Us (1992)

Melanie Griffith goes undercover with a bunch of Hasidic Jews to crack some kind of case and falls in love with one of them, who explains that killing someone is ending an entire universe and then later kills somebody to save her. I might have this movie confused with the one where Melanie Griffith goes undercover with a bunch of Nazis and Michael Douglas has to come save her.*

Did not remember that Sloane is in this!

* Shining Through, turns out. Also 1992! Are these two movies available on two sides of the same special DVD on a rack at Rite Aid?